How to dominate at blogging

I was curious today what the “big guns” of Internet marketing tell their audience to do, in order to be successful. I’ve been accused of being an “Internet marketer” before, so I needed to know more about what I was supposedly peddling.

I visited their websites. I was inundated with pop-ups telling me to subscribe to get free content. Free content!

(Let’s ignore the fact that I was actually trying to read free content on their site when I was interrupted with their offer to receive MORE free content.) So I took the bait and subscribed. I didn’t even bother finishing whatever I was reading on their site, because I was hot on the trail of MORE!

Once I was signed up for these FREE mailing lists, I was “personally thanked” via autoresponder (which assumes I either don’t understand the word “personal” or what the “auto” in auto-responder means).

I skimmed each of the free books I received for signing up. I put my snark aside as I waded through, “GROW YOUR LIST LIKE ME” or “I MADE TEN BILLION DOLLARS WITH AFFILIATE MARKETING AND YOU CAN TOO!”.

I learned exactly what to do to have an online empire like they do. These stories were all told quite humbly (with lots of name dropping and accomplishments listed).

I think Internet marketing has taken the place of “Get rich quick” travelling seminars.

Remember Tom Cruise in Magnolia? Respect… The Cock. It’s a derivation of that, except with ebooks, videos and infographics. Less overhead! No need to invest in those costly but tiny microphones that attach to your head!

The rub is that these people actually do well. They have huge stats, massive mailing lists, and are easily making a “decent” (I could have probably chosen a more appropriate word) living. They have captive audiences, eager to eat up what they’re peddling. Someone out there (a lot of someone’s in fact) eat this up like pudding—universally recognized by Internet marketers as the most widely consumed and enjoyed treat.

To follow in their enormous footsteps, since I’m an Internet marketer too, I am going to share what I’ve learned about how to be successful on the Internet, because I personally want you to to be successful, too.

(This will turn into a FREE ebook later for new mailing list subscribers.)

The world is a richer and more fulfilling place when all the sleazy salespeople are thinly masked as content creators.

Let’s all win at blogging together!